对不起。我只是对自己没信心罢了

what's wrong with fall with people

i feel stupid to fall for a person

hard get someone when you need them

the feelings, i couldn't describe

i'm trying myself to accept everything

but yet, sometimes i feel uncomfortable

i dont care, i fall for you, so i try to accept

alamak! i dont know how to express it

*update after finalssssss*

the reason for me to have a blog is because i wanna to update everything and note down everything in my life. but since N months before, i didnt really update my blog. what's in my blog are just those nonsense that not related what's in my life. :) i know, due to some reason, i dislike to update it.

my semester going to end soon. i think i m not going to update everything in my semester here. but what? i enjoy :) stories, i think i should be update it during my holidays, now actually i m preparing for my finalssss. but my mood wasn't in study. hmphhhhhhhh

by the way, what's wrong with me? my mood was down.

射手

关键词：
我看(I see)

你、射手
拿着你的箭准备射向真理?
准备射向自由?
两眼一摸黑
却不小心射伤了爱你的人
甚至射伤了自己……

障碍：
看不到的恐慌

请冥想出一副画面
一个半人马的骑士手持弓箭
被一块布蒙住了双眼

他有力量
因为他是马
有耐力和强壮的大腿
他可以跑的很快
他有智慧
因为他有人的头脑
他有工具
一把很有用的箭

但是这一切发生了一个转折
他的眼睛被蒙蔽了
他跑偏离方向还摔跤
他很紧张
手足无措地乱射箭
因为他好害怕好害怕……
只有这样他才稍稍觉得安全

射手通常自己蒙上眼睛
这样他就不用去看到目标
也不用在意周围的景色和人
这样他们就可以安全的活在自己的世界里
但是真的可以安全了么?
换来的就只是无尽的恐惧
他们会很担心
然后想要逃离

你爱他
想要抚摸他
他看不到
却以为是攻击
于是踢你一大脚
然后才发现搞错了

他们依赖爱人
因为他们要依赖别人的眼睛去走路
可当你告诉他的时候
他却又不能相信
因为他并没有自己亲眼看到

原因：
一个射手的孩子
似乎很早就开始思考起人生
他们喜欢观察
他们也深入思考
但奇怪的是
越观察越迷惘
越思考越困惑

射手男在爱情方面有很坏的名声
射手女往往被大家说成是“傻大姐”式的人物
但是请注意了
在他们毫不在意的外表下
却隐藏着深深的创伤

他们对恋人的黏着欲望绝对不亚于金牛
他们就是小孩子
期待着保护也期待着成长

其实射手座是一个十分克己的星座
因为他们半人半马的特性
使得很多射手压抑了下半身的渴望
所以我们经常会看到举步不前的射手座
他们压抑了自己动物性的一面
也同时压抑住了自己的力量源泉

射手恐惧那原始的力量
他不知道如果他照着自己的目标去奔跑
是不是会引来太多的敌人?
会不会失去太多的伙伴?

解决：
射手座不势利
即使他们想要获得金钱
也并不是因为金钱本身
他们想要的是那个高处的感觉
那个山顶的视野

不过他们并不知道
蒙蔽他们的并不是一个低处
并不是因为他们在山底
而是因为他们蒙蔽了自己的眼睛

不过请不要指责他们
在小的时候我们都是无助的
我们没有能力选择社会道德
也没有能力选择家庭
其实就算可以选择
父母们受到的教育也是压抑性的
小孩子哪懂什么性?
他们只是对自己的身体感兴趣罢了

但这个不幸一直都在发生
这个禁忌取缔了射手座的力量
他们相信头脑远胜过本能
而在某些压抑过渡的情况下
本能的力量在他们头脑没有足够防备的时候
便将他们多年的控制击败

深呼吸
当你和你爱的人在一起
深呼吸、共同呼吸
去感觉那个身体
那个深埋的爱的情感

触摸、爱抚
情侣间的按摩
都对射手具有疗愈的作用
慢慢地……
当他可以活在自己的身体里
那个“看”就会出现
他睁开眼睛
不再有恐惧

i love this post

why i care?

people, i am lost!

tears are disturbing me

from the call

mind changed

try as soon as possible

people,i'm suffer. i can't tell out everything.this time, i think i'll regret badly with my decision. sohow?istillhavetostaystrong

ionic bonds or covalent bonds? nope, it's FRIENDSHIP bonds

they're important in my life, without them,

Jace that you meet will never appear in front of you.

for everyone, they think that i'm strong, sad face will seldom appear

that's what i had learn from my babes!

closing the light around me, looking at the laptop screen,

i remember something about our past.

light off, movie screen on, maggie mee with us. that's what we always did when we sleep over.

chocolate in room will never never happen again if i'm alone

songs that we sing during wash plate and toilet are slowly disappear from my mind

the sounds, the voices are getting softer and softer,

until i can't really recognize.

when's the last photo of us? the sampat, the smile?

they're not with me and my heart is with you guys.

sun, rainbow, star and moon

they occur because of gossip. but how long didn't for us to do so.

and i remember laughing is our medicine

no matter how tired are we, after laughing everything change fine

tic toc, tic toc, tic toc, tic toc. . .

i had leaving from you guys for 3 years i think.

during all these years, i meet others too

until the last, we're still being bond together, can't even separate

dears! we need to sleep over again. sharing secret.

there's something that i haven told you guys

honestly, i didn't even dare to share out. i feel sucks with myself

only with you guys, the real me will never hide away.

TALK. we need to wait for the day to come

♥